Post #20 - I'm Coming Out

Hey everyone, I know it's been a long time since I've actually posted anything, and for that I truly do apologize. Summer just kept getting busier and busier, what with classes, part time job, and everything else that went on during those hot months. Phew! But I'm glad to be back at UCONN. I've missed it so much.
So, there was only one point to this post, and by reading the title, and by knowing me in real life, you've probably already guessed what I'm about to say. I've been wanting to write this down for a while now, get the word out and everything, you know? I'm finding this post really easy, and yet really hard to make out. Like that makes any sense, haha. OK, here's the big news:

I'm gay.

There, I said it! That felt good. You know how you feel when a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders, and you're finding you can breathe easier, and it's not as hard to take your next step? That's how I'm feeling right now! It's an amazing feeling, finally having come to terms with my sexuality.
So, I'm not expecting any of you to be like "Oh my God, I would have never of guessed." No, I'm expecting most of you to have at least wondered about it, guessed, or simply assumed. I never was the most masculine guy out there.
Now that I'm out, I know my life has gotten a lot harder. It's not going to be as easy for me to be accepted with the general public, and believe me, I've already met a few homophobes that have made my life difficult. Which sucks, and is something I'm going to have to accept in the coming years. Hopefully, the general population will get over it's fear of gays. We're just like the rest of you, only we play for a different team. So what if we don't like boobs, vaginas , and all that. Don't you think in this day and age, things that aren't mainstream can't become accepted? There has to be a million examples  all over the place.
I'm also going to have to learn some of the things I can't do anymore, like give blood, join the military, or get married (but that's why I have Canada, Our true north, strong and FREE, where I can be whoever I want). As for America....with liberty and justice for all...I'm starting to believe that's not true. I mean really, this isn't even a question. Do we really have equality in the US? Not to be hating, because I really like my life here in the States, but when you claim everyone is equal, can you at leat be trying to make it that way?
It's like a giant blindfold has been put over people, and they're being lead to where they think is right, but it's not. At least some people have the courage to take off their blindfolds and say "stop, this isn't right." I have to applaud those people, I really do. Having the courage so stand up for what you believe in, when a huge crows is shooting you down for who you chose to love takes a lot of guts. Hopefully, I'll be able to do that as well, and I'm looking forward to the experience (which will hopefully come in the near future). I cannot wait to raise my voice and defend this way of life that I have chosen for myself.

That's all for now, and I'm really glad I got that down. Thanks to all my friends (at least those I've told at this point) for their support. It's friends like you that have made this so much easier for me to live through this transition period of mine. I love you all for it.

dan
a new gay man


Mood: Exilierated - At this point, how couldn't I be?
Music: Glee - The first episode of season 2 aired yesterday. Duh
Location: Rainbow Center - Makes it easier for me. Everyone's so accepting here, and it beats being in my room.

Vlog Post #2: Gaga, Geography, and Get him to the Greek

Vlog Post #1: People Watching

Music Video #3 - Tainted Love by Straight No Chaser

The A Capella version of this song is so good. I love all their music. Check out their site at: www.sncmusic.com. They've got some great hits; their holiday album is hilarious. Check it out!

Post #19 - Summer 2010 - The College Way

Hey all,
Basically, Summer 2010 - The College Way is pretty much the same as 2009 - The High School Way. Pretty lame right? Haha, I know. Whatever, I'm used to it and I've got over it.
Well, I guess there are some changes. I now have a job; I'm so happy. Since my Green-card finally came in, I can FINALLY get a job. Getting by on allowance before was SO NOT COOL. I'm currently working (in case you were wondering) at de maximis. it's a pretty cool job, and it pays well. I'm only doing it part time, so I can't really get my hands dirty, but next summer I hopefully will.
So, catch up on what you've missed in my life? It's July 2nd as I'm writing this paragraph. Canada day was yesterday. Hooray!! Isn't that exciting? My last informative post was in March, which was quite a while ago. I'm proud to say that since then I have stuck to my new years resolution, to get more in shape. I workout three days a week, which I'm really proud of. I was afraid I would stop over the summer because there was no gym nearby, but i've made due.

So i'm taking two courses over the summer, Calc and Chem. Calc is almost over, and I have a high B+, low A-. I'm so surprised, last semester I had a D+ so as to the change in grade, I have no idea. Chem starts soon, and that's the one I'm worried about. However, if it goes as well as Calc is currently going, I'm sure I should do fine. Here's to hoping that!!

OOf. Music video time. Sorry, random right? Gimme a sec...let me find one....

Uh Oh - Kyrah
Hmm...Ke$ha knock off? It's a good song, but it seems to be a little bit too similar to Ke$ha, topic wise and all. But, not bad. Not bad.

Let's see, I don't have that much else to talk about this time, sorry! I know you're all disappointed, haha.
talk to you all later,
dan

Mood: Sick - Something I ate isn't agreeing with me.
Location: My Room - Like I would be anywhere else
Music: Samba - Is there anything else to listen too?

Post #18 - The End of the World as we know it

Being the odd child that I am, one of my favorite genres in literature and media is those that deal with apocalyptic events and/or post-apocalyptic scenarios. Over the years, I have come across several great works of these types, and i still cannot get over how interesting they are. I mean, there are endless possibilities when it comes to this scenario, who better than a writer or director to explore them all? They bring about a whole new chapter in human history (or future if you will). Media of this type is hugely popular, from 2012 to The Day after tomorrow. I've experienced so many of these and am going to share my few favs with you all. how about I start with some of the books I've read....

Man, this sounds like I'm writing an essay, doesn't it? Haha, oh well. I'll try to have fun with this while keeping you all interested (but if you don't want to put up with me talking about books for the next few paragraphs, you should scroll down. If it helps, just look at the pictures).

One of my all time favorite books that I have read in this genre is "Earth Abides," by George R. Stewart. The story follows the life of a boy named Isherwood (Ish) Williams. At the beginning of the story, Ish is living in a mountain cabin in California, doing research for his graduate studies, isolated from the rest of civilization. At one point, he gets bitten by a rattlesnake and is forced to remain in bed until he can recover. While in bed, Ish gets horribly ill, and fears that he is coming down with something on top of the rattlesnake poison within him. When he returns to health, he travels back to society to discover that everyone has been killed by a deadly disease that has decimated the world's population.

Ish travels across the country, searching for survivors of this terrible plague. While traveling to New York city and back, he comes across and adopts a dog that he names Princess. He meets up with several survivors that are attempting to live off the food and trash left behind in the city. As he travels, Ish realizes that staying in the city would mean certain death, as there would soon be little to no food to live off of. Realizing this, he returns to California where he meets Em, a strong woman who he falls in love with and marries.

Once he meets Em, a new section of the book begins entitled "the quick years" and describes in a few pages the next 21 years of their life, how several other survivors joined their new "colony" and how their numbers began to grow rapidly with the large numbers of children being born. At one point, Ish remarks how "each child pushes the darkness back a little further", referring to the expansion of his now tiny world. After this brief section, the middle portion of the book describes the "year 22," and all the eventful things that happen during that period of time (i will not reveal that here, you'll have to buy the book yourself, the link is given). this is then followed by another interlude entitled "the quick years."  This section marks an undetermined number of years as the colony moves forward in its life. After this, a third and final section marks the conclusion of the book, with an ending that I, myself found satisfying, yet wanting more.

There are several main topics that Stewart inserts into the story, one of these is the resulting return to nature, and how that will affect the world around them. The characters in the novel are forced to endure plagues of ants, and rats. buffalo and lions (i believe it was lions, although I cannot recall, sorry), as the natural words struggles to return itself to the way things were had humanity not existed on Earth.

The second topic that Stewart covers its the loss of technology and literature. Several times in the story, Ish remarks how much knowledge will be lost, and attempts to teach the children in the colony as much as possible. However, the children are reluctant to learn, having never experienced "school" as we know it. Ish fears that the colony will not be able to survive once the things left behind by the "Old Americans" as they are called, are gone. He fears that without guns and bullets, they will not be able to catch game, or without their supply of running water from the dam, that they will not be able to get enough water. However, as the years pass, the subsequent generations learn what they need to survive through Ish's careful guidance. As Ish was attempting to get the children to learn for school, he realized that they would not because it wasn't fun, so instead he tried to make the important things they needed to learn into games and fun activities. so, in an attempt to save his colony, he build the children some bows and arrows ( he "reinvented" them) and gave them to the children to play with. Later, the children took these bows, and adapted them to suit their less childish needs as the guns that they were using began to fail because of rust.


A third topic that Stewart covers is a reintroduction into myth and superstition into this new colony that does not understand the world around them. A child is confused by a coin with a winged lady on it (or something, I cannot remember) and asked Ish if that was what the "Old Americans" were like. The new generations believed the "Old Americans" to be almost Godlike, having built the impressive, yet imposing structures that the new generations know nothing about. Imagine living in a primitive world, but having a structure like the golden gate bridge looming out of the fog. what would you think? Ish also carries a hammer around with him, he's had it since page one of the book when he got bit by the rattlesnake, and it has never left his side since. The rest of the tribe sees Ish as their leader, and when Ish gets old, and asks one of the children to bring his hammer that was resting against the wall, the child refuses to touch it. Ish then realizes that the children have become very superstitious about this hammer, treating it as a symbol of power, and authority. in another time, Ish notices how one of his great-grandchildren explains to him how when building arrows, they fabricate the heads, out of coins. However, they only use "the red ones" for one type of animal, and the "white ones" for another.this lack of understanding about the world is very interesting, and could be where some of our very own superstitions come from.


all in all, i thought this an amazing book, and I will come back to it later, I promise.

So, for those of you that are bored with books, I am now going to talk about a T.V show (Yay!!!!). This show is called Survivors and it airs on BBC America. It takes place in Britain, and follows the story of a couple survivors of a massive plague that killed 99.9% of humanity. It's similar to Earth Abides, I know, but it's different enough and presented in a different media that it's enough to get me hooked.

The main character (and my favorite) goes by the name of Abby Grant. While the plague was happening, Abby's son was away at camp and Abby was left at home with her struggling marriage. Abby got sick with the virus and somehow managed to survive (the only one who did, sorry if that reveals too much, but it had to bed done). Once Abby recovers, she begins to search for her son Peter, because she believes he might still be alive because she survived. Throughout all of season one (in which there are only episodes :( so sad ) she is searching for Peter frantically, searching every possible lead she finds on his whereabouts, not giving up when they lead to deal ends.

Joining Abby as part of the cast is Tom Price, an ex-convict who we know little about; Dr. Anya Raczynski, a doctor that ran into Tom when he got in trouble and helped him out; Greg Preston, a solitary man that wants to go his own way; Al Sadiq and Najid Hanif, a playboy and child forced together after the plague. Each of these characters have their own backgrounds that make them unique, Anya attempts to keep her being a doctor a secret because she was devastated by the fact that she couldn't save anyone from the plague. Greg doesn't want anything to do with them and wants to start a farm on his own, Tom is constantly confronted about his past, Najid is an indian child who lost his whole family. Al, the son of a wealthy father, had been living the good life, and is finding it difficult to adjust to this new world. Abby persuades them all to stick together by telling them that they will be able to survive easier on their own. the speech she gives is really powerful, and brings out the motherly nature she holds for everyone she knows.

I believe one of the major themes this show is teaching us is "are people basically good or evil." In this new world, the survivors have to decide between what is now right and what is now wrong. Am I allowed to shoot someone if they try to steal my food? What are the new rules in this strange world? Tom is always quick to raise a gun to anyone who threatens Anya or the rest of his group. Is he doing what's right, or taking advantage of people? In a time like this, all the rules we currently possess change. what was wrong before might be right now, and vice versa.


through all media of this Genre, it is interesting to read about how the next generation is effected by whatever disaster befell mankind. One such example of this is the novel "flood," by Stephen Baxter.This novel depicts a world that is slowly flooding due to oceans under the crust breaking open, flooding the whole planet over a span of 65 years. near the end of the novel, when some of the main characters are on rafts, (I'm sorry, but I do not have the book and cannot quote it properly) the children are described to be diving down to depths and for lengths that were previously thought impossible to be done without aid. With no knowledge of the "old world," this new generation finds themselves in a world that for them has always been like this. Then have no feelings of loss at all. They have no memory of a New York City, trees, or insects. I think it's amazing how authors depict how the newest generation adapts to their world. It's truly inspirational, even if it's not real.


Well, that's about it. I hope you enjoyed my spiel, sorry it took so long. Next time i'll inform you of what I've been up too. Promise.


See you all soon,
dan

Music Video # 2 - So Soll Es Sein by Ish & Ish

I don't know what it is about this song that i love, but i think it's amazing. When I hear the beginning, all I can think about is a beautiful sunrise. Weird? Probably. Sorry, haha.

P.S Sorry about the video being too large, I'm not sure how to change it, any suggestions?

Post #17 - Grrr. not yet Spring but the olympics are over.

Hey all,
so, it's not yet spring and I'm kinda mad about that. I mean, seriously Global Warming??? couldn't you just kick in for once and make spring come a little earlier? I know I know, as an environmentalist, i'm not supposed to think these kind of things, let alone write them. but so what if im cold. I have a right to complain. I want spring NOW. I want it now. Spring break is going to be so cold, I am not looking forward to it at all.

Anyways, next topic. the olympics. did you watch them? I know I did, every possible minute of it. i mean, why wouldn't I? My home country was hosting. can you guess which one? Hmmm... this might be hard....haha, k. it's Canada!!!! You should have known that, right? some people are out there are so bad with geography. this one time i was on chatroulette.com with this gal from Kansas. she didn't know where CT was, thought it was a city in mass. sooo funny!!!
oops. haha, back to the Olympics... well. Canada got 13 gold medals. I'm so happy for us. most we've ever gotten, and the most gold medals total for any country this time around. Canada also was the host country to ever win the most golds in the winter olympics. awesome, eh?

Music Video #1 - Sore by Annuals

My Psych teacher played this video before class today. I really like this song now and although the video is kinda weird, it was still pretty good.

Post #16 - Welcome to a brand new world

Well hello there, have I seen you before? Perhaps I have passed you while walking down the street sometime. did I say hello? Was I nice? No? how unfortunate. Perhaps we can get to know each other soon. Wouldn't that be nice.

Anyways...

So, first post of 2010!! Isn't that exciting? I haven't posted anything in a while, and like a classic blogger I feel it is necessary that I add this next sentence...

I'm sorry that I haven't written anything in a while.

Phew! glad I got that out! It seems that every blogger that hasn't written in a while has to include that sentence in his or her first post after a long break. I didn't want to be the exception...

Anyways, I'm probably boring you to tears right now. Here's a Kleenex. ha ha.

Sorry.

Anyways, you're probably wondering what my new years resolution is, since i managed to keep my last one perfectly. I'm so proud of myself for that one. So my thinking is that since I did do well on my last, this new one must be that much better. O.K. here it is: to apply myself more in school to get a 3.263 GPA this semester and to get more active by going to the gym more often. If all goes according to plan ( as it doubtlessly will. fingers crossed) I will look like a combination of me, Einstein, and this dude....

ha ha. Idk who he is but I would KILL to look like that. (Take a look at me this time next year and I will look like that...

I WISH)

Anyways, there were some more topics that I wanted to post on this post. give me a sec to try and remember what they are.

Uhhh.... sorry still in vacation mode. Ah! Christmas! ha ha. Christmas break was fun. Not amazing fun, just fun. middle kinda fun. I didn't really see anyone except for the three time all month. Three times in a month? that's kinda sad. even for me. I'm sure I can do better next time. So anyways, I got some nice stuff for Christmas. some books that I had wanted. like this one. I love Robert Jordan (The Gathering Storm (Wheel of Time))!! Then I also got some American Eagle clothing, which is like the best!! Love that store. I'm afraid I can't recall anything else that I got b/c i forgot. oops. But those were my fav. things anyways.

So I'm taking some more classes this semester, 17 credits up from 13. It should be a challenge, but I'm totally up for it. My classes include: Chem 1128Q, Math 1131Q, Engr 1166, Cse 1010 and Psyc 1100. Unless you go to UCONN you probably don't have any idea what those classes are. I'll explain:
-Chemistry
-Calculus
-Foundations of Engineering
-Computer science
-General Psychology
All in all, they will be tough, but interesting. here's to hoping I can keep up!!

So, I recently applied for a summer job at de maximus, inc where my neighbor works. de maximus is a environmental clean-up company that also does various other environmental acts. If I get the job I would be soo excited. I think it would be a great experience for me in my major. Who knows? Fingers crossed

well, that's about it. I can't think of anything else to write, so i'll catch you all up later.

dan

Mood: Relaxed - Just got back from the gym (yes!) and am in a good mood
Music: Pandora, Lady Gaga radio -Love Pandora, and love gaga. She is soo good!!
Location: Dorm room - Chris has like a million friends over.
Later: Work and meeting a friend (hopefully) - First day of work this semester at Putnum. Hope I don't forget everything!!